But I dont want to small talk. Text me, and without

saying hey, tell me why your sister scratched you 

that other day. Tell me why you're hot as fire and 
cold as fuck so sudden. Tell me night stories which 
can blow my imagination because I can't fall 
easily...asleep and for anyone. Have you spend 
every summer inside like I did in my home 
when you were small? Call me when I’m

half asleep and say how you can let it happen 
that we lose something special. Go on for hours 
about things that are possibly not important 
because I want to know you. Tell me or tell 
me not. I don’t want with this confusion.

Who is to blame?

So is western world responsible because it let it happen? Or the Middle east because it didnt prevent it? We all know Islam is stricter and not so tolerant. I guess there, it was easier to abuse religion. They are still caught in Middle Age whereas we overcame it. I don't think it was an easy time to be rebellious, to open up society and and make all life forms be accepted. Without the 68 generation, we would be somewhat behind.
Why don't you let it slide that the victims of Paris get more attention than all the otheres and work on yourself? Change doesn't happen by itself. When something happes, nothing will be the same

If it doesn't harm us, we don't care

There is a lot to cry about, a lot to be mad about and in most cases we can't do much. There are borders and we can't make all happy.
The truth is we are selfish. It's our biggest interest to care for ourselves and the people around us. Thus people don't show much empathy.
It's not about wars only which are on focus recently, it's also about nature. How often have we learnt that global warming is bad, that globalisation has its downs? We don't care because it doesn't hit us now, but maybe in the future which you can't see. Temperature is rising, well polar bears are in danger, but we are fine. It hasn't hit us that hard yet and even if it did, we would have money to build up again unlike poor countries. Those who feel the negative effects are always the poorest. Globalisation has brought many companies profits and also taken advantage of cheap labour. Are we willing to pay fair trade prices?  We admire beautiful countries and love to visit them. Some mostly because it's so cheap. It just doesn't get into my mind why people want to pay local prices and not get ripped off. As if it does matter that you pay a few bucks more. I'm not saying do tip a lot, but pay a little more than locals. You earn more. It's the least you could do.
On the long run, we are living our lives on the shoulders of the poor and don't feel responsible. World has settled to this. The powerful take advantage of the poor. I'm still up for making the world a better place. It's the best I could do.

You don't have to defend yourself for something nobody asks you about. Why do you feel the guilt that you don't mainstream? It's just a little gesture to show awareness like the ice bucket challenge. Here it doesn't mean other illnesses are less important, like ebola which happened to be at the same time. Coloring your Fb picture in the french flag as a sign of condolence. You don't do it because it would mean the other victims are worth less? I wonder why if a misery happens, there are other people which point out things which make you feel worse. Do color your picture every day! Also, you are not affected by it yourself. It's not you or your family on the line, on any side. It's not you who should say look at the other side because tell me have you been doing it constantly? You've been watching and now you're saying "See, told ya!" You are not any better because you say every single human being is important. You know for sure why we are more shocked by Pairs than Beirut.
It's truelly sad that we start caring now, but honestly it has started long ago and the politcians didn't care. It could've been prevented. Just human history is not about being smart, it's about being us. We laugh, we cry and we learn. Mistakes are included. Being human means to show empathy, to take action, to help and to make the world every single day a little better.
Here is my reason why I didnt color mine. It's nonrelevant as writing this: I didn't feel I had to. I simply don't possess the need to express myself. You had to explain why you didn't as if people would bother to think about you and wonder why didnt he/she and I just don't necesarrily care. Not showing that you feel sorry doesnt't mean it doesnt affect you at all. I change my Fb picture very seldomly and I dont post often. I dont change my pic just because fb tells me to, i just simply dont. My free will. You are not bad or good if you do this or that or not..

The way we feel

So Terror has hit us in the heart, in Paris. After je suis Charlie Hebdo, we are Paris now. There are no words to describe how we feel. This should not have happened. Attacks and deaths, thats Middle East, but not Europe! People have been dying and refugees have been coming and we didnt care. Some didnt even want to let them in. Their life is at risk, well that's their problem. A sad world, some say. No actually, just no! Yes, its bizarre that we cry for Paris as if their lives worth more than refugees, that it hit us harder than anything else before. And people have been killed constantly. Just see it as this. Attacking Paris is not only surpassing European security borders (yes we feel safe and free and that's why many refugees flee to us), but also go afterwhat we stand for. If you hit one member of the EU, you hit all. In our heart are our inner values and Europe has been reserved in taking any actions against the Islamic State. We care for France because it's basically family. We feel connected to that country. It doesn't mean we care less about the rest, but here is a bad example: We care about our brother more than about somebody we just happen to know. And I wouldnt know what to do. This is the time for some action at latest. Also now we know what the refugees flee from.

P.S.: I hate those hints that state it's a double standard that people care now but not earlier. It's rather before war didnt affect us, but now it does.

Coming back to places
you have been
realizing
never the same

When you love that you cant let go
love it till you become shallow

Istanbul
place of history
loved by many

My heart sank
not because it lost hope
but to your ground

Du streichst mir durch die Haare
Dein Lachen hör ich in allen Ecken
Ein Schatten huscht an mir vorbei

Astonished I met you
we spent little eternity
All gone we parted

Definier dich neu
du bsit niemals gestern
und ist ein tag oder drei
dann sind das nur die geister der vergangenheit

Ich möchte sein

Ich möchte sein

Alles, was dich bedrückt
Rumirren nach Lust
Alles, was dir wehtut
Sie in deinem Herzen
Alles, was dir lieb ist
dein Innerstes

...und du, damit du mir gehörst.

Ich möchte sie dir nehmen

Alles, was dich bedrückt
wie der Schuh
Alles, was dir wehtut
wie die Nadel in deinem Herzen
Alles, was dir lieb ist
dein Innerstes

...und deinen Schmerz, damit du mir gehörst.